the year of my 40 begins…
I wondered how I would mark this occasion. I thought I would just post a video of the song that best described how I feel the morning I wake up to 40. I tried to do a little celebration every day since November 1; I realize that the celebration was really a ruse. I am simply enjoying being alive and well. But being the person I am, I had to do something.
So while watching Black Girls Rock, I received inspiration from Tatiana Ali who wrote a letter to her younger self. The Year of My 40 begins with a letter to my younger self.
Dear Marva,
I love you. I wish that you could see what I see in you. There is such potential, such vitality, such love inside you that I don’t think you realize. I would like to tell you a few things that I think will help you along in your journey…things that I have learned during my 40 years on this earth.
Through all the challenges that you will encounter, please remember that you are strong. Even when it feels as though life is crumbling around you, you have everything in you to withstand the storms and arrive at your destination. Your strength is your strongest gift. Use it wisely and don’t allow anyone to convince you that you cannot stand on your own. You can…and will.
One thing that I’ve learned is that sometimes you have to separate yourself from those who bring you down, no matter who they are. You have a light, Marva…many people are intimidated by that light and try to snuff it. Use Matthew 5:13-16 as your guide and never forget that you are God’s child. He has created you with something unique; pass that gift along to others so that they too may see God in you.
Love will never hurt you. Love doesn’t lie, or lay in wait, or hide from you. Love will find you when you realize that it lives inside you. That companionship that you crave, those times when you feel lonely…remember that you always have family and friends who surround you who pray for you daily. Love comes in many forms; don’t settle on one way to give and receive and manifest that love in your life.
Believe, Marva. Believe in your dreams and believe that you can achieve them. It may not happen when you think it should…God doesn’t follow your timeline. As long as you put forth the effort and trust that God has given you everything that you need to succeed, you will achieve those goals that may seem unreachable. Believe that life is here for you to live it. Believe that you can be whatever you choose to be. Believe that love will lift you higher than anything else you encounter.
Most of all, never lose sight of who you are. Step outside of your box sometime to learn something new about you. Face everyday with positivity. Give all of yourself to those you love, things you are passionate about, and never be afraid to speak the truth…it really does set you free.
You have a road ahead of you that will at times be tough. You will cry and desire and feel alone. You never are. Remember that always and treasure the moments when you smile. Embrace the times when you feel love surround you. Freedom is what you will have by loving who you are, no matter what other’s opinions of you are.
Happy Birthday, Marva. Celebrate by dancing, because sometimes that is the only answer.
Til I die, I’ma fucking ball…who gon’ stop me, huh?!
~ M
AWESOME letter to your self!! I actually had the same idea but then I figured at 45 that was too damn much to write about so i just went through tons of pictures of me at different stages in life! Be blessed Hun and realize that God is just getting started!
Smooches!
Regina
Thank you Ms. Regina!