Conversations with Marva

Head Nod Music Break, #1

Y’all all know how much I love Jill Scott, right? I mean, LOVE her. Not just because she sings the soundtrack to my life (it seems like every song, every album, could be a story about my own life, right then and there) but because I recognize in her what I recognize in myself: freedom. And I mean, look at the fierceness in the album cover above…how can you not say, “Damn!” when you look at her!?

The talk that a new Jill Scott CD is somewhere in the near future has me giddy. Absolutely giddy with excitement and anticipation. I rarely buy CDs these days, with the exception of Kanye and Adele, but this will definitely be one that I will slap down my credit card at Best Buy for. I think it is only fair to offer compensation to the woman that has moved me along my path, sung my song, and crooned me to be the me that I am.

Ms. Jill has a duet with Anthony Hamilton that I love, from the upcoming album, The Light of the Sun (isn’t that a delicious title?).  Enjoy the goodness that is Ms. Jill…

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ekoAbholeZI 

Nod your heads,

-Marva

Grown Ass Woman Interlude #1

Excuse me while I interlude, please:

In speaking with one of my good girlfriends the other night, I said to her that being a grown ass woman means realizing that your life is just that: YOUR LIFE. The choices and decisions you make lay the foundation for the path that you take. It has absolutely nothing to do with what so and so has done to you, or what people think about you…it is purely how you look at yourself in the mirror and see yourself that makes you a Grown Ass Woman.

Life is throwing me things that I have to duck and dodge. But I know in the end, there is a light. A light that will reassure me that everything has a reason. Not that it is going to end the way that I want, or that I will get what I believe I deserve; more, the universe has surrounded me with assurance that I will be able to move on from whatever challenges that come and stand taller, speak louder, and continue to be free.

It is absolutely amazing how much clarity comes with almost being 40. I used to be so afraid of that number; now I am embracing it because I know the best of me is yet to come.

This is my wish for every single woman that I know in my life, and even those that I don’t know…because it is in this space that a Grown Ass Woman thrives.

Peace,

- Marva

Some Words About Adele…

First of all, let me say for the record that I’m not new to the Adele train. I’ve been on this puppy since she was crowned Best New Artist at the 2009 Grammy Awards, and I loved her from the first moment I heard “Chasing Pavements.” With that said, I have a few words to share with you about how this latest CD, 21, is affecting me.

A little background…loving someone is hard business. There are ups and downs, of which you cannot even imagine. There will be tears and laughter, a feeling of losing control of everything that you believed that you stood for, and a feeling that you can’t be anything more than you are. I never imagined, though, that someone could put into songs each and every feeling (or at least the ones that hit you the hardest). Well…anyone besides Jill Scott, because she is IT for me, you hear me? IT…

But when Adele’s CD was released in January, I put on my earphones and turned it up. I read the back story on the CD before listening, and I wanted to see if she would meet my expectations of laying everything on the line and just standing in her emotions for everyone to see. I was not disappointed.

From the very first heavy strumming of the guitar of the opening song, “Rolling In The Deep,” to the wistful and emotional “I’m finally letting you go” of “Someone Like You,” Adele has created one of the best crafted CDs I’ve heard since…well since Jill’s The Real Thing Words and Sounds Vol. 3. Don’t get me wrong here; I am NOT comparing the two; what I am doing is recognizing the pure unadulterated way that both of these ladies stand naked and let you see their emotions, no matter what you think about them or what those emotions are.

Where Jill is often reasonable, Adele is naive and full of dreams. She wants to know why, and fights to understand what she is going through. Adele toes the line between conciliation and moving on during every single song on her CD. She sings full of remorse on one song, and heavy of freedom on the next, and even almost begging on another. That is the nature of the beast that is love; you never know how you will be affected until you go through it. The one thing that Adele has done for me since listening to this CD is to let me know that healing can take on many forms. Letting go is a process, and not a destination.

I know it’s been a few months since this CD was released, and you all have probably heard it. I want you to listen again and again, until you understand the place this young lady is coming from. It is a place that is known to women everywhere: losing someone does not necessarily mean that you lose yourself. And working through all of the joy and pain associated with loving someone is the only way to grow.

I listen to this CD at least once a day. As such, my favorite song changes daily. Each song means something different and represents a different aspect of a relationship. This is a 5-star CD in my opinion. There is no higher compliment that I can give to Adele and her work of art than to say that I learned things about myself listening.

This is one of those CDs that will remain in my ear for a very long time. The last time I felt this way about a collection of music was, well…

You get the idea.

- Marva

Welcome Back, Marva!

Gosh…I look around this place and can see the dust. I see the cobwebs in the corners, and all the furniture is covered. Time to make this space livable again.

I took a break from blogging because I was lost. I believe I was trying to make this into something that it is not, trying to emulate all of the successful bloggers that I see constantly day to day. But that’s not me. I don’t want that. What I do want is my space that I carved out for myself a long time ago when I started this blog, a space where I can feel free and say whatever I want, feel how I feel, do what I do. So I don’t care who reads or who doesn’t; what I do care about is that the words I put here mean something to me.

So I’m no longer chasing pavements. I choose to find my center here and be honest with who I am. That’s the way I want to live my life.

I finished my book…the first draft anyway. Now I’m faced with the monumental task of making it into something I can proudly put in someone else’s hands and have them understand what I’m saying. It took me a long time to get over the initial fear of having someone else read my words, but that fear is in the rearview mirror now. When you realize what your potential and walk is to be, fear becomes irrelevant.

I also gave up social networking for Lent. I must admit I did sneak on every once and a while to check to see what was going on. But giving up Twitter and FaceBook helped me to finish my book. It helped me to clarify things around me, and move forward. I wasn’t a big user of social networking anyway, but the time away was refreshing. I listened to a lot of music (I have some words about that Adele CD, just wait) and read a lot of books.

I’m preparing. And it is exciting.

I hope you all are well. Let’s walk our journey, shall we?

-Marva